Slice of Life
by SakuraSpark
Summary: Drabble one-shots and anecdotes of Dez and Trish. Many various AUs.
1. Movie Critic

A/N: This was not beta-ed. So, apologies for any errors or bad writing. XD

This story was inspired by the anime, 'i Can't Understand What My Husband Is Saying'.

I do not own Austin & Ally.

* * *

 **Movie Critic**

"Hey Dez, it's our day off! Let's go catch a movie or something!"

The said ginger groaned and tossed around in their bed. "I was up all night though..."

"Oh, come on!" urged Trish. "We hardly get a day off!"

Dez sighed. "Alright, but I'm going to take my own...sweet...t-gasp!" The man's jaw dropped at the sight of his wife's puppy dog eyes filled with unshed tears. "I'm getting ready!" He yelled as he ran into their en suite bathroom.

Trish smirked as the door to the bathroom slammed shut and wiped her eyes gently. _That always works like a charm._

* * *

"I'm assuming you want to watch the latest movie?" Trish pointed at the newest animated movie that just came out two days ago.

"Well...I'd like to post a review about it on my blog," beamed Dez. After his director career had taken off, his personal blog which occasionally reviewed movies had suddenly had many hits and hundreds of new readers.

* * *

 _-After the movie-_

Trish yawned and stretched. "Well! That was a rather nice movie!"

"The whole setting was totally cliche and lacked anything new. The protagonist suddenly disappeared and the story about the sub-character dragged on for too long. The flashy effects, composition, and the fact that kids would enjoy it is all well and good, but that just contradicts the idea that adults will enjoy it too. It just felt too opportunistic, making me lose interest," muttered Dez rapidly, a look of serious concentration on his face as he planned his review.

After a beat of silence, Trish raised a brow at the redhead. "Er, I apologise for watching the movie without considering any of that."

"WELL!" Trish jumped at the sudden loud volume. "Let's go to Melody Diner and get some Cha-Cha Chicken Pot Pie!"

The Latina stared after her random husband who had just taken off in the direction of the diner and shook her head in amusement.

* * *

-End-

A/N: Yeah, short drabble. Hope you enjoyed it nonetheless. I hope to have more coming in, if possible.


	2. Drunk Devil

A/N: All errors are entirely my own.

Today's theme is slightly risque. ;) Sorry if any OOC.

I do not own Austin & Ally.

* * *

 **Drunk Devil**

 _When I woke up this morning, the room was trashed._

"Hey, don't you think that this is a bit messy?" Trish asked as she frowned down at the upturned table and scattered clothing all over the living room floor.

Dez merely shrugged. "It wasn't me."

Trish turned to face her husband in confusion. "Huh? Then who..." Dez smirked and peered down at her in a knowing manner.

"What? A burglar?"

"Nuh-uh." Dez shook his head, smirk still in place.

"Then..." Trish sheepishly pointed at herself as Dez nodded almost solemnly. "You're a pretty bad drunk, Trish." "Ack!"

 _I'm aware that I get out of hand when I'm drunk. It takes a while for me to actually get drunk, but when I do, I sometimes lose my memories of what happened. However, it doesn't happen very often...unless I'm drinking my sorrows away._ Trish stared down at her disheveled self. _Things weren't going well at work yesterday so I was pretty stressed-_

"It was pretty bad," Dez's voice interrupted Trish's thoughts. "You said you'd take me 10 times within one second." He raised a brow at the girl, almost irritating Trish with that smirk still on his face.

"What?! Y-you're lying!" Trish, face flaming red, stared in wide-eyed astonishment. "There's no way I'd ever say that!"

Dez then suddenly took on a serious demeanour. "No, no...here's what happened..."

 _Trish kicked open the door, snarling in her half drowsy half drunken state. "Let me do you, damn it!" she yelled at her husband who was shocked from the sudden door slamming._

 _"Heh? Why are you suddenly all excited?!"_

 _"Come on, damn it! You've got a pretty hot body!" grinned Trish as she attempted to take his shirt off._

 _"Noooo! Please stop!" Then, whimpering to himself with tears streaming down his face, "This is so mortifying..."_

"LIES! No way! Tell me you're lying!" Trish yelled at her husband who was currently dry sobbing into the couch arm.

* * *

"Well then, next time you're drunk, I'll take pictures and videos of you in HD resolution." Dez calmly took a drink from his glass as he savoured Trish's home-cooked dinner.

"All right! Bring it on!" Trish pointed at the redhead. "But forget 'next time'! Let's just go drinking tomorrow! It's Friday anyway!"

Dez gave a thumbs up and readily agreed. "Fine!"

"Let's go to a few places."

"Okay."

 _This is a good chance. I'll get to see what he's like when he's drunk._ Trish smiled to herself.

 _I'll have to make sure she doesn't ruin her life with alcohol. Otherwise I'd be dead every time she takes a drink._ "Hm?" "I haven't done this in a while! I'm excited!" beamed Dez.

* * *

 _The next day - TGIF!_

"Sorry! Did you wait long?" Trish hurried up to the waiting ginger but he just greeted her with a kiss. "No worries." "Well then, let's go!"

"Cheers!" The couple toasted to the end of another week as they enjoyed their bar snacks and drinks.

"Oi. that Long Island Iced Tea you're drinking wouldn't happen to be actual iced tea, would it?" Trish squinted at the drink in Dez's hands as he nearly choked on his drink in his mild panic on the blow of his cover before she continued nonchalantly to pick at her food instead.

* * *

 _Round Two_

"You know, I always wanted to brew my own beer."

"Eh? Isn't it illegal to do so?"

"Not if the alcohol content is less than 1%. Then you don't need a license," Dez explained as he sipped on his Virgin Mojito, unbeknownst to his wife.

* * *

 _Round Three_

"Maybe I'll run for government! Then I'll change the liquor tax laws and we can start a brewery!"

"That sounds _really_ troublesome." Trish pouted slightly then turned towards the bartender. "Hit me with another glass please!"

* * *

 _Round Four_

"U-um...we should probably..." Dez stuttered as Trish gulped down several shots in one go.

"Hehehehe!" Dez stared blankly at his giggling wife. _Uh oh..._

"Hey! Let's play strip rock-paper-scissors!" leered Trish as she leaned over towards him drunkenly.

"Huh?"

"Rock, paper...scissors!" Dez threw out a rock as Trish showed scissors and she stared stonily for a moment at their hands.

"I guess I don't have a choice!" Trish laughed as she started to remove her shirt.

"WAIT A MINUTE!" Dez tried to stop her before she suddenly hugged him very tightly.

"I love you! I'm drunk so I'll keep saying it! I love you! I love you! I love you! I love you lots!" Dez sighed as the Latina snuggled against him. "Me too...mmft!"

"Shut up! Smooch!" Trish had declared before she forcefully kissed the man.

* * *

 _In the end, I don't remember what happened again._ Trish woke up the next morning, back at home and in bed, not a scrap of clothing on her as her equally bare husband dozed beside her.

"What did I say?" She directed the question at him.

"Hmmm?" Dez grumbled sleepily. "It was...yeah...something magnificent...zzz..."

"What do you mean by that?" Trish poked at the snoring man.

"Majestic...transcendent..."

"That makes even less sense to me," sighed Trish as she resigned herself back to snuggle back into bed with a small smile.

* * *

A/N: I hope you liked it! By the way, just remember that all chapters are unrelated to each other unless stated. Cheers!


	3. Newlywed Life

A/N: Why am I writing this one day before my exams? Stress? Bah.

This chapter is set directly after Wedding Bells and Wacky Birds and the scene was inspired by the Korean drama, 'Birth of a Beauty'.

This is a **friendship** fic.

I do not own Austin & Ally.

* * *

 **Newlywed Life**

"I don't understand."

"What's not to understand? I need your help to finish the marriage assignment my new life skills teacher assigned!"

"But...why the heck are you taking a new class in the middle of the school year anyway?" A confused Trish asked the fidgeting redhead.

Dez sighed. "I saw how much fun Austin & Ally had during their assignment, and I figured, that could be an easy way to get extra credit! So I joined another class!"

"Can't you just get Carrie to help you?" The girl huffily folded her arms at the troublesome task.

"You know that she's going back to LA in a few days, and she still has to finish taking some photos for the Emu commercial! Please?" Dez looked down sadly at the girl.

"And what do _I_ get? I'm not in the same clas-Done! I'll meet you at your house after school." Trish readily agreed as an Andrew Jackson was waved in front of her.

* * *

Preparing the groceries that Dez had bought so that they could pretend to be a "married couple" and cook together, the duo suddenly fell into a comfortable silence as second thoughts plagued their minds.

 _'Married couple? What was I thinking? Being married to this doof...I should have asked for more than $20.'_

 _'Married couple? Huh, maybe I should have tried to ask Carrie instead. I hope Trish doesn't kill me in the process. I really need this extra credit.'_

The two beamed at each other as their actions suddenly hurried in the unloading of the grocery bags.

 _'Married couple?'_ The simultaneous thought occurred again.

"I don't think this is going to be enough. Cooking together." Trish looked up at Dez who had suddenly spoken.

"But we already seem like a married couple. What more do we need?" Trish spun a potato in her hands as Dez warily glanced at it, fearful that the fiery girl might suddenly throw it in his direction after his suggestion.

"We should do something that we've never done before! Like real newlyweds! Now don't kill me, but I got us some things," Dez cheerfully said as he pulled out 2 large bags and Trish looked at them with apprehension.

* * *

Trish bit her cheek as she wiggled her toes in the fluffy slippers that she was currently donning. Glancing briefly at the lollipop in her hand, she popped it into her mouth as she surveyed the candles, cookies, and chocolate fondue set up on the coffee table in front of them.

She tiredly looked toward her left where Dez sat, bouncing giddily in his seat as he wore a bright orange version of the bright pink pajamas that the girl also had on.

"Well, this isn't half bad!" Dez sucked happily on his own candy stick as well.

"Really? Do you really think that we look good together right now?" Trish responded with a deadpan expression. _Well, I guess the lollipop did taste delicious. And the fruits surrounding the fondue fountain look frostily appetising as well._

"Of course! Our chemistry would make even Brangelina cry!" grinned Dez as Trish's eye twitched at his sappiness.

"Now say ah~" He held up a strawberry as Trish thinned her lips.

"Who wants another Andrew Jackson? Say ah~"

After an internal struggle, Trish took a deep breath and removed the lollipop. "Ah..." Dez popped the fruit into her open mouth and left the entire fruit there as Trish glared at him.

Pulling the remnant leaves out herself, the brunette then grabbed a banana. "Now _your_ turn. Say ah~"

"No no, you're doing it wrong. We're supposed to be newlyweds. Call me 'Honey'."

"Honey?" Trish cringed and shivered. "I just got goosebumps!"

"Newlyweds _are_ supposed to give goosebumps! Goosebumps aren't even enough to describe the feeling!" Dez pouted and then nudged the scowling Latina. "Hurry."

 _'Try not to kill your fake husband now...'_ thought Trish as she gave her a huge pretend smile.

"Honey..." she gritted out. "Ah~"

"Ah...mfft" Trish stuffed the banana into Dez's open mouth and rolled her eyes as he just merely chewed happily on the remaining banana.

"OK, now, as newlyweds, we need to do some family planning! What do you think about kids?"

"Kids?"

Dez nodded cheerfully. "Do you want a baby?"

"Well...I guess I do..."

Dez nudged her happily. "Hey, me too! Do you want a son or daughter?"

"Um...a son? It doesn't really matter to me."

"It doesn't matter to me too! A son would be able to protect his mom though. It'll be reliable to have them. And then a princess to dote on! All right! Now that's settled, who do you want them to resemble?"

"Uh..." Trish didn't really want to admit it but Dez's red hair and blue eyes did go really well together. "I guess if it's a son...you?"

Dez smiled broadly. "And if it's a daughter?"

"If it's a daughter, of course she should take after me!" Trish replied with confidence.

"Eh...Nah...Then she'd have the bushy hair and-hey!" Trish had gaped in offence and elbowed the ginger boy as he winced and laughed at the same time.

Trish couldn't help but smile as well at the sight of Dez. "Yelp!" Dez had suddenly tickled her! How dare he! This is war!

A flood of giggles and crazy laughter soon filled the room as the duo took their turns at the impromptu tickle war which was abruptly stopped as a thought came to Trish.

"Wait a minute. All you have to do for the life skills assignment is just to do a presentation! Austin & Ally only did all the extra stuff so that they could have fun while working out a budget of a fake wedding!"

...

"Aw man, seriously? You mean I spent 50 bucks on all this stuff and it wasn't even compulsory?" Dez sighed. "Well at least we're having fun."

"Yeah, well, you still owe me $40."

* * *

-end-

A/N: XD


	4. Compatibility

A/N: All errors are my own.

I do not own Austin & Ally.

* * *

 **Compatibility**

 _'So I randomly ran into one of my old classmates today.'_

 _"So is married life going well?"_

 _"Well...surprisingly yeah!" Trish beamed, a small flush on her cheeks._

 _"By the way..." the younger girl suddenly whispered conspiratorially._

 _"Hm?"_

 _"How's your compatibility?" The girl had winked at me._

 _Trish's brows scrunched together. "Compatibility?"_

 _The girl nodded. "Mm! You're going to be living together for a lot of years. I think compatibility is pretty important."_

 _Trish was still slightly confused. "I see...?"_

 _"I mean, y'know, besides physical compatibility." The girl nudged Trish, both eyebrows bouncing teasingly as the latter blushed harder._

* * *

 _[How Compatible Are You With Your Husband?]_

 _'I couldn't help but be curious so I bought this.'_

"Now let's see... _'It's important that you both understand each other.'_."

...

"Trish! The dog isn't texting me back!" Dez's voice from upstairs floated down.

...

"Now let's try this book instead." Trish tossed aside the pink book and picked up another.

 _[Blood Types for Lovers]_

 _TYPE AB  
_

 _Offbeat/Unconventional  
_ _Has Foresight  
_ _Speedrunner (Completes video games as fast as possible)  
_ _Difficult to Understand_

 _TYPE O_

 _Passionate  
_ _Lax on Details (Except when money's involved)  
_ _Straightforward  
_ _Jealous character  
_ _Motherly  
_

 _Compatibilty: In this relationship, either is not going to get their own way no matter how hard they try — so it's a much better idea not to try at all_

Trish scowled. "Perhaps astrology would be more accurate."

 _[Love Astrology]_

 _AQUARIUS_

 _Positive  
_ _Sincere  
_ _Incredibly Unpredictable  
_ _Very Social  
_ _High Level of Intelligence (They prefer not to show it)  
_ _Brilliant communicators.  
_ _Original and Creative  
_ _Idealistic  
_ _Magnetic & Mesmerising_

 _CANCER_

 _Persistent  
_ _Dependable  
_ _Kind  
_ _Tender-hearted  
_ _Can be unforgiving/resentful  
_ _Sociable  
_ _Possessive  
_ _Generally passive (except when it involves their passion)_

 _Compatibility: They say that opposites attract, but do they? The least compatible astrology signs are those that typically clash with one another and problems can arise. If these two can complement each other, things could work out great. If not? Well, it's not a good match._

Trish sighed, now utterly depressed.

"Hey, it's raining! The laundry!" Trish watched as Dez pattered down from upstairs and rushed out to their balcony.

"I'm going out to the store for a bit..." Trish muttered.

"Eh? But it's raining...?" Dez turned around to find the main door shutting.

* * *

"I see. Compatibility huh?"

Trish slouched into the comfy couch. "Sorry to bother you at work."

"No worries, I finished what I needed to do in the morning. So...why did you come to me?"

"Well, you're the smartest among us and you're my best friend! You're supposed to have the correct advice. So what do you think? You know, I feel kinda nervous after seeing such certainty in books."

"Bandwagoner." Ally replied with a straight face and a calm tone.

"Huh?"

"That's what Dez would probably call you," her best friend laughed a little giggle. "Now I'll just leave you with the advice of 'Stop bragging and go back to your happy life!'" Ally slowly dragged her friend off the couch and shuffled her slowly towards the door.

"When you're too happy, you no longer feel happiness. That's what it means to be human. How do you _really_ feel right now? Hurry home, silly."

"Hmm..." Trish stood out in the rain, contemplating Ally's words.

"Huh?" The rain around her had suddenly ceased and she looked up to see Dez looking down at her, a neutral expression on his face.

* * *

There was a comfortable silence between the couple as they headed home together.

"I received a call from Ally."

Trish looked down at the ground. "I see...Looks like our compatibility sucks huh?" Trish continued seemingly nonchalantly.

"LTTP much?"

Trish looked up at her husband, the neutral expression still present on him.

"What?"

"I already looked that up on the internet a _long_ time ago. Well, I stopped caring about that after I did that with you."

"'That'? What're you talking about? Tell me!"

"Sure." Dez suddenly stopped in his steps and turned towards his wife, his hands casually flinging their umbrellas to the ground as Trish stared confusedly. He then placed his hands lightly on her shoulders before leaning down quickly to kiss her deeply and after a moment, her leaning back in.

"See? It's easy." Dez smiled brightly.

* * *

-end-

A/N: I visualised Austin watching them from afar thinking: 'That was smooth.' *takes notes*

LTTP: Late To The Party

I used Raini's and Calum's birthdays because the birth dates of the characters aren't revealed. Also, grabbed descriptions of the "bad" horoscopes online and plopped them together haphazardly, don't stake too much belief in it. :D

Could you tell whose personality description was whose? ;)

A reader PMed me and asked if I took requests. Yes, I do. They'll not be published in this story though and will be a one-shot on their own. Read my profile for deets. (:


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